As I write this column our Governor is getting ready to meet Mad Dog, his new roommate, at the Metropolitan Correctional Center Federal Prison. Although I’m sure that he won’t spend much time in the accommodations this is surely a day for him to remember.
As the news tells it, Governor B. was trying to get money and/or other reciprocities to assign Obama’s old Senate seat. The feds had his phone tapped and heard him practically putting the Senate seat on Ebay. I mean what was he going to do, assign the seat to a professional wrestler?

Governor B. decided that if he couldn’t get enough for the seat that he would assign it to himself. After all, he allegedly lamented, he could get more resources as an indicted Senator than being stuck as Governor of Illinois and, eventually, maybe even become - - - President of the United States.

Alright, let’s be fair. First of all, we did set the bar way down for the President job with G.W. Bush. It’s only natural that anyone feels that they can do the job these days. Second, Governor B. doesn’t really make all that much money. According to Illinoisloop.org he makes $150,691.00. In comparison, the Mayor of Chicago makes $210,000.00. The District Superintendent of school district U46 makes $329,000.00 and the President of the United States makes $400,000.00. Is it any wonder that Governor B. feels insecure?

Now I know that for most people a hundred and fifty large a year seems like a fair piece of change, especially with all of the benefits. But in a country where Hannah Montana is both the name of a stripper and a Disney character, and where the most requested burger topping is another burger (ok, maybe that’s just me), and where young people are taxed to allow old people to afford erections (no, definitely not me) that kind of money lets you buy Christmas gifts at Costco.

“I want to make money,” the affidavit quotes him as saying in one conversation. And I’m sure that all the times that Governor B. looked at President numb nuts he thought, “If that guy can be President, I’m putting in my resume and making the bigger bucks.” He would be stupid not to be stupid about it.

Ah, for the good old days when Illinois politicians were kindly creatures who wouldn’t dream of doing something ruthless or illegal. Politicians like Aldermen John “Bathhouse” Coughlin, Mayor Richard J. Daley Senior, and, of course, our last Governor George Ryan who is doing a six-year bit for racketeering (his inmate number is 16627-424 and he is in Terre Haute prison in case you want to send him something nice for the holidays).

Legally, I guess that Governor B. still has the power to assign the seat. Maybe he can sell it to Mad dog for a carton of smokes before he gets convicted.
And so it goes. Just when Illinois was starting to regain credibility in politics with Chicago’s favorite son Obama, we lose it with Blagojevich. Well, it was a nice run, just a little short. Frankly, my only embarrassment is that our State is outed as having the only governor that looks like a bad hobbit.