We've all struggled to say it over the years.  I'm the guy who can't say NO. I will help anyone move. Anyone. Just ask me. I can only lift 20 pound boxes but they always hop me up on free caffeine and doughnuts and I scamper around like a crazed bunny.  No. It doesn't even look nice on paper. Yes is so much more appealing, exciting and just easier to say. Would you like some more? Yes. How about a huge mortgage Dave, even though your credit is the worst we've ever seen and thanks to people like you and our cheating bank the world economy will get destroyed very soon. Yes, Where do I sign? Would you like another free drink? Why Yes, I'd love to be sloshed beyond all recognition. When is the last time you said No to a free drink? Ya, probably never. In sales I learned a trick that if you say 'yes' at the end of a question it's almost impossible for people to answer in the negative. 'Could I talk to your boss briefly about making his portfolio recession proof.. don't you think he'd like to hear that? Yes? Yes, it's lame but it works. Nobody likes to follow a 'Yes' with a 'No' but maybe a 'maybe'. Yes.

I'm so afraid of hearing 'No' that I've never technically asked a girl out, unless I've had lots of those above mentioned free drinks. I just found out last week that most girls hate to say no so much that they would rather give out their number to some complete a-hole than tell him 'No'. This would've been knowledge I wish I had a few years ago. Seriously ladies, you'll give your number out to anybody since you don't want to come off as being rude or callous. I've seen the most annoying, disturbing dudes on the planet get numbers from ladies who should not be talking to such wastes of flesh. Then these neanderthals keep on texting away with their witty LOL and OMG till these girls give in and go out to dinner with one of these knuckle draggers. Then they become one of those couples you see on the street and you say 'mismatch' a little too loud to your friend and this dude over hears but doesn't care cuz he's already impregnated her with his demon seed and the cycle of morons continues. She's stuck with this loser because she didn't have the courage to let this dude down with one simple word. NO! It's a sad truth that being annoying and persistent pays off in this life especially for complete D-bags.

Many of you are thinking that if she was afraid to tell him 'No', then she deserves to be harassed by his hormone fueled phone calls. I disagree on the grounds that she would then be labeled rude or even a bitch by this guy.  No one should care what this guy thinks about anything but if we're really honest with ourselves most of us want everyone to like us. Don't you agree, Yes? It works for me and I'm a complete jerk to women, but who is now dating Mary Kate and Ashley Olson. Yes, it's me.